Home Columns Mike’s Musings – A Black Friday worthy of purgatory

Mike’s Musings – A Black Friday worthy of purgatory


By Mike Wilcox, Publisher
By Mike Wilcox, Publisher
By Mike Wilcox, Publisher

Some days just aren’t worth getting outta bed. I had one of those days last Friday. While many of you were celebrating Black Friday, buying the latest and greatest toys and electronics, yours truly, had to make his way to the office.

Let me tell you, it wasn’t easy. At the stroke of six I climbed out of my comfortable state of sleep only to be greeted by excruciating bank pain. A couple of days before I had done some heavy lifting but thought nothing of it. Now, two days later my back was telling me it was in pain. I walked, no strike that, I crawled to the bathroom. I couldn’t bend over to place my socks on my feet so I chose to go sockless.

Somehow I made my way to the garage and my trusty vehicle. I slowly lowered myself in the driver’s seat, turned the key and heard only a click. What, this is odd. I tried again, another click. My care wouldn’t start. My battery was dead. Oh great, I now would be late for work.

Rather than risk being late, I jumped in to our second vehicle, and made the drive in to work without another incident. There I was sitting at my desk, my back continually pulsating, viewing my dozens of emails, petting the office cats whom always keeping me company perched on my desk, when it hit.
The cat we call Bonnie, apparently had an upset stomach, and just like as quickly as a single glance outside, she had vomited all over my keyboard. This day was not getting any better, I thought. Thank God, we had a replacement keyboard in the next room.

So there I am. Only two of us in the office, one wishing she was with her sisters at the mall, and me just wishing I could be home in bed nursing my painful back. I decided to call the utility company and pay my electric and water bill. I hadn’t received it this month for some reason, but knew it was due. After about six phone calls I finally connected with a live voice. Sure Mr. Wilcox, you can pay, it is only $670 this month.

I went ballistic. My monthly service had never been over $300 and now it was $670. And oh by the way the live voice said she can’t take my payment. I have to pay online, where the service company takes another $10 for the convenience. I went ballistic again. Thank God, they did agree to come to the house and re-check their calculations. I’m praying it was a mistake.

So I didn’t have to pay that bill, just that. Whew. So at lunch I go to a fast food restaurant. I grab some unhealthy crap to eat, and pay the bill with my credit card. The clerk comes back and says my credit card is declined. I couldn’t believe it. What the heck.

I get back to the office, get online, and find out that the credit card company had put the card on hold because someone in Paris, France had charged $440.00 on it. I told them it wasn’t me. I hadn’t been to Paris in 25 years. They told me to destroy the card and they would send a new one. I asked how long that would take and they responded, 3 to 4 weeks.

Yikes, I use that card for everything. Now I have to manage through the Christmas season without it, because some hacker in France, decided he needed his Peugeot repaired. Can this day get any worse?

Of course it could. I decided to cut out of the office a few hours early because there was very little work to be done. After all, it was Black Friday and most of our clients were shopping, and not working. I squeezed into my car, my back still aching, and headed home.

Halfway there, I heard sirens and saw lights flashing in my rear view mirror. Darn it, a patrol car was right behind me. I immediately pulled over. Thank God, I had my registration and insurance. I grabbed it out of the glove box with my driver’s license and handed it to the officer when he motioned for me to roll down my window.

He had clocked me at 10 over. He politely indicated that patrols had been beefed up because it was a holiday weekend and I should slow down and do the speed limit. After checking my documentation he waved me off. Whew, I had dodged a bullet there.

Well I finally made it home without further incident. My back was still aching and the hot tub was calling my name. I will remember this Black Friday for a good long time. Rest assured next year this workaholic will skip plying his trade the day after Thanksgiving.