Humor by Bill Frazer
Webster says that LOGIC is “the study of the principles of reasoning.” In my book, “common sense” is the same as LOGIC.
The LOGIC topic came up as I made my way to the Post Office this morning. I stopped by Allen’s Flowers, and Coroner Jeff Jones and Myrtis Allen were discussing who had died. On my way back to office, the thought came to me that at my advanced age they may be planning my internment at any time.
In view of that, I want to make my LOGIC known that I do not want to be put away in a $8,000 casket. A cheap metal box will do just as well as I have already left my body and no big deal needs to made about the physical remains. Oh, they will say, “We will be embarrassed at the funeral to let visitors see you lying in a crate.” Then drape the Stars & Stripes over the box as I am a 4-year veteran (with a year of service in Korea) and that would be a great honor for me. Take the money from the burial policy and help pay for the grandchildren’s college tuition. This is nothing against the funeral homes as they have a very difficult and delicate job dealing with grieving family members and loved ones.
As I addressed LOGIC, another event came to mind. Yesterday I received a special renewal notice from National Geographic Magazine. I gave up my subscription years ago due to the increased rates for the magazine. The renewal notice stipulated, very plainly, that I could renew my subscription for only $12/year or a cost of only $1 per copy. This offer doesn’t seem to have LOGIC because how can they reduce a $71/year subscription to to $12/year? It is a very informative magazine with wonderful photography. So I sat down at the keyboard to place the order. As I was typing in the order to remit $12, the screen stated that another $47.40 would have to be included for handling and shipping. Plus 2.9% Alabama sales tax must be remitted. The $3.95 shipping & handling fee per issue was printed in tiny letters at the bottom of the renewal notice.
We all have a tendency to disregard LOGIC. My wife participates in the Publishers’ Clearing House Subscription Drawing based on the chance she will win the $100,000/week for life. Although they highlight on national TV a subscriber receiving the prize, it is not LOGIC that there would not be any chance this one lady would win when the odds are more than a million to one.
I mentioned earlier about using some funeral policy money to pay for the grandchildren’s college education. The same LOGIC applies to the Georgia Lottery. There are countless TV ads promoting this gambling enterprise that is an important part of free tuition (@$900 million) for Georgia college students. Who do you think is paying the 38 billion dollars that is reaped from the lottery participants? The people who buy the lottery tickets. A high percentage of lottery ticket sales are made to people who are receiving some kind of a public assistance and they hope a winning ticket will relieve them of their misery. This is not LOGIC! The reality is that the poor are suckered in to pay for public education. Is it LOGIC that the Director of the Georgia Lottery receives a salary of $300,000 annually?
In Alabama, the lottery is prohibited but is it LOGIC to not compete with the free rein on the pockets of the residents by allowing casinos on Native American held lands? Also, instead of stopping by Tuskegee, Alabamians now drive to Biloxi to lose their money.
Bob Dylan said it best: “The answer my friend, is blowing the wind.”